The trials and tribulations of a couple of Brexpats take a look we would love to hear from you!.
Living Through Lockdown - Day 1 through Day 60
It was an strange and eery feeling the morning the lockdown started vans patrolling the streets with speakers giving us the advice that
we needed and what was expected of us, time and time again in Spanish then very kindly in English.
It was a feeling that i had felt before although a long time ago. I was travelling on a ferry over the channel from France to Portsmouth, I was 15 and
the Falklands war was raging. The Sheffield had been struck and had sunk ..... they turned the engines off and sounded the horns. A sense
of inertia sense of foreboding, thats what we experienced on the morning the lockdown began.
However we could not have of known in our wildest nightmares what it would mean for us in Spain and those in the UK. The numbers kept
rising and rising and we watched the UK still not locking down and having big crowds / events at Cheltenham, Anfield and the
Stereophonics at Princes stadium.
We were further shocked by the Prime Minister getting himself infected and having to go into intensive care, he clearly didnt believe his
own advice or that of his advisers and continued to shake covid victims hands in hospitals .... this set the scene for the UK lockdown as quite a few people followed his
lead and continued as if nothing was happening.
The keyboard warriors were at it on Social Media we spent far too much time looking at it however it was surprisingly useful for giving us updates in English.
Wendy was in the UK trying to get a flight back to Spain despite having only just arrived in the UK. So it was my own company for 2
weeks. We needed a plan! Luckily i made my way to Leroy Merlins on the Friday evening before the lockdown and bought some ballustrade P
paint, railings paint and a lemon, grapefruit and lemon tree so we would have some projects.
We set ourselves some targets and aims:
To lose weight (or maintain) the worry is that i will be too big to cycle at the end of it
To learn to cook some Spanish recipies
To do a Joe Wicks workout every day to get a stronger core and help with my weight
To do at least an hours Spanish lessons every day
To look after my old Mum and entertain her
To get to know my neighbours better
Not everything went to plan though there is a strange lack of motivation running through us we have lots to do but a strange malaise
covering everything. We are addicted to Social media and really struggle to put the phone down, The news is constantly on and we are
watching the figures from both sides of the Channel, we need to work harder on this.
We are eating well but shopping local is expensive but we are saving on so much else. Every problem we have now feels like First World problem
problems and we find ourselves checking ourselves before we speak.
As i type we have been lockdown for 60 days and we are just starting to see a relaxation of the lockdown everybody is being ultra
cautious and frightnened of the second wave so here is hoping and a final thanks to all the Key Workers who have sacrificed so much.
We pretty much stuck to our plan which gave us some structure and helped us survive but there were also some surprising outcomes that we did not plan:
I have been learning about Spanish history
I have started only wearing trackies and vests!
We have relearned to love our house
We have the endless ability to lie in bed, we started not getting up until 10AM.
We have got really fed up with television
Bird Song is just awesome .....
We have learned to relax and enjoy just being in the moment
We have learned to love our garden all over again (so glad we have it)
We have stopped snacking and taking sugar
We feel stronger and more resilient
We appreciate all the local facilities, shops etc
I have got my pro Camera out and relearnt to use it - I have been shooting the mountains and sunsets
The next door neighbours brought us a tiny wild tortoise to look after it had been attacked by an animal but is making great strides now
Abril 2020 - A terrifying month - The month of NHS Heroes and Muertos
April carried on in the same vain as Marzo left off, we were in lockdown and thank god we were.
Terrifying figures hitting our televisions and telephones and i mean truly terrifying with Europe becoming the epicentre of the pandemic.
We were getting used to these big numbers from Italy and now Spain with some very untimely international events causing massive spread.
Numbers of dead soon reached 20,000 with no sign of a let up in Spain and Italy becoming the worse infected regions. Care homes having
been abandoned in Spain as the infection ravaged, old and vunerable people left to suffer and die.
Our lockdown having been extended 3 times already in Spain and not one complaint was seen or heard. Fines were being given out like
confetti for those who broke the rules, still nobody complaining. We saw a few cases of Covid in Pilar but we were luckily free of
infection in Campoverde. With the population of Pinar being so elderly Police seemed to be making an extra effort to ensure the
precautions were being adhered to.
We looked on with aghast at the UK's lack of action against the virus! We heard mutterings of "Herd Immunity", we saw the Cheltenham Cup
go ahead with a crowd of 130,000, we saw a Stereophonics concert go ahead as well as a Championship League game against Madrid played
out...... we just couldnt belive our eyes. Boris knows best.
Boris was gaily prancing around hospitals shaking hands with covid patients whilst his Fiance was at home expecting a child..... we knew
we were not going to get sensible from a man who didnt believe in the virus.
Then hey presto international pressure and deaths became too much and the UK announced a kind of lockdown as the numbers soared to the
same level as Italy and Spain.
Boris further piled pressure on the NHS by falling to the disease himself, maybe now he will believe now he is in intensive care.
It seems there was some political thing going on when Europe tried to help us with ventilators and Personal Protection Equipment.
Europe choosing to try to help us despite us leaving on pretty poor terms, they could havetold uswe have made our own bed ..... however
choosing to help us provide beds, who doesent want to be part of that organisation.
The tide is turning ..... people are questioning the govenrments motives now and hopefully we will get to the truth in the end as the
dead do not have any representation.
The figures in UK surpassing Italy and Spain seems to be on the cards 26,000 dead already its horrific.
In Spain the figures have begun to drop and the Deescalation (deescalada) plans for the lockdown are being made and we will soon have a
little more freedom. I can see that many people in Campoverde are in no hurry to mix. And everybody is afraid of the much talked about
2nd Wave.
We cannot guess what life will be like as a World or even what Campoverde will be like? How many business's will be reopening after the
lockdown? 50 Days of no trade will have pushed many people into poverty whilst still having to pay rents and rates.
NHS staff in the UK and Spain have gone above and beyond as have other essential workers our hearts and thanks go out to them, i dont
think they will ever be underestimated again.
Marzo 2020 - Tragedy, Heartbreak, Lockdown and the Coronavirus
After the fantastic weather and riding conditions of Febero Marzo had a lot to live up to. If only we had known the terrible turn of
events that were to shake us not only in Pinar de Campoverde but Spain and inded the whole World.
We had narrowly escaped the clutches of the Coronavirus making our escape from our beloved Sri Lanka little did we know that it had not
finished with us just yet.
It became painfully obvious that this virus was developing into a huge problem that would effect everybodys world not just China. We
could see flights from and to China being cxancelled and the fact that China had lockeddown Wuhan and Hubei province with swift and
terrible response. Lockdown in Chine meant complete lockdown no travel no visiting not even allowed out for food in the begining.
Then the crisis spilled out violently into North Italy with devastating results with tragic amount of deaths, this soon began to spread
into the rest of Europe and mutterings of a high level of cases in Spain. European Football matches between Italian and Spanish teams
being called a biological time bomb!
Wendy had travelled to the UK for a holiday with her parents not 1 day before we began to see the bubbling up of this terrible
illness.
Spain banned flights to and from Italy soon to be followed with many more bans from other European airports, the Schools were closed on
the 12th March at this time there were just 3000 cases and 54 dead.
This was swiftly followed on the 14th March by the declaration of a State of Emergency which gave Spanish authorities unique powere to
confine us to our homes, we woukld only be allowed out to get essential shopping, visit the elderly, Pharmacia, the bars and resturaunts
were to close and all other non essential shops .... in a word a disaster for all involved.
Wendy still (now stuck) in the UK started to think about flights back home.
We had been told that we had one evening left so I went to Dinner that evening with Mum and her freinds for Fish and Chip Supper in
Juanita's Pizzaria in the village! There was a strange atmosphere in the resturaunt with strangers talking to strangers all talking about
the lockdown many not believing it would happen at all and much speculation that the Spanish would not obey it! Little did we know.
On refelection I am so pleased that we had the last supper as it really was the last chance, the village was surprisingly quiet which
could mean that the residents either did not know about the lockdown or didnt believe it?
On the first day of lockdown i didnt know whether i could ride my bike or not? I messaged Jose from the local Spanish cycling club who
said SI so off i went to meet the Grupo (this was the last time i would see them for a very long time). There was a big group split in 2
we went one way on a hunt for a cafe for coffee, not a chance everybody was obeying the rules ...... we did 140K some of us suspecting
that we would not be able to ride a gain for sometime. It felt really odd not be stopping for coffee.... its that sociability thing.
The next day was a Sunday first thing in the morning there were cars driving around the village with bull horns telling us to stay safe
in the house it was really scary and erie we live in strangetimes. And just like that the riding was .......over, along with everybodies normal life!
We were only allowed out for the following reasons:
Go to Farmacia or Doctors
Go to local (nearest) supermarket
Walk the dog (within 50M of your home and only your dog
Thats it we are all scared and stuffed thank Wendy we have a garden! Stay Safe
Febero 2020 - Elephants, Monkeys, Tuk Tuks and Coronavirus
February was a cheat month for us we had been saving for quite sometime to take a holiday in Sri Lanka this was to be a special holiday
in that we were meeting my Son Dennis in Sri Lanka after not having seen him for 2 years after we went ou seperate ways, him to NZ and us
to Espana. Mum, Wendy and my eldest Daughter all making our way to Sri Lanka.
The holiday was fabulous, the resort i had booked proved to be very remote which in the end played into our hands making us relax and mix
with the locals much more than we would have of normally.
The 10 hour flight was a small price to pay for the instant warmth of the tropics the lowest temperature we felt was 32C it was
fantastic. We took a 3 day trip in the middle where we were able to see Elephants, Monkeys, Bats, Trains and the local dancing it was
amazing. The people being so kind and friendly also.
The talk in the Village: There was only one subject in the village and that was Coronavirus, we had been lucky to get away on holiday and
return before the flights and restrictions had set in although we saw a lot of Chinese people stranded and flights cancelled.
From such tiny beginnings we were starting to see cases being reported in Italy in big numbers it was all a bit distressing.
I can tell you for sure though nobody was predicting what would happen to us in Spain just the next month.
Cycling Life: We were experiencing a mini heatwave the shorts and summer jerseys were back out. It was quite simply amazing i have
visited Spain in Feb so many times and i have never seen weather like it.
The fields were full of flowers the mountans full of strange vegitationand the air full of Citrus Blossom.
However the air was also full of Pino Pollen so much in fact that couds of it could be seen in the air whilst riding! This has meant
great hardship for many people with hayfever we know personally of one fella that was bed bound for 2 weeks. Eventually the pollen gives
way to "Rice Krispies" which cover the Earth block drains.
Riding with the Belgians
The Costa Blanca is full of Belgian cyclists retired, holidaying or living part time.
taking advantage of the all year round riding whilst secretly enjoying the strong winds. Pascal of La Ropa once said to me “the English you have the rain, the Spanish have the mountains but we have the wind”.
Riding with the Belgians means no quarter is given everything is fought for, a wheel, position, respect, friendship and slipstream are all currency to be fought over.
The Belgians are the only nation that enjoy a strong wind. These winds will make a flat route feel like a long climb whilst the Belgians seemingly immune to the stress as they dance around the group always finding the best shelter.
You will find yourself riding very close to the gutters as they hold fast right to the gutters or fast left to the centre ensuring they give you as least shelter as possible.
You will find yourself riding with multiple ex world champions. You will find yourself riding with guys of 80 years of age plus who ride you off of their wheel, legends in Belgium.
When you have the Kaffe Pause the Belgians will find the sun to sit in during the winter and the shade to sit in during the summer they dominate the cafes but never leave rubbish and always polite.
Mostly they like to ride 2 abreast and 5k on the front, there will be many complaints if you pull off too early jeers and laughter!
You think that you can climb, you can’t, you think you can descend, you can’t, you think you are strong you are not.
I have known the Belgians turn round at the first spot of rain declaring we will ride tomorrow. Where are the long suffering wives? La Zenia Boulevard I am told spending my money.
Most of all you will find fun and friendship, just don’t expect them to speak English
Enero 2020- A New Year arrives
The common tema (theme) running through January was electricity. The cold has come in good and proper some of the days had excellent warmth highs of 24c but it seemed that this just emphasised the cold in the early mornings and evenings which we’re actually bitter cold! It really does reinforce our perception that living in Spain you are either hiding from the Sun or hunting for the it it’s a complete change of life from the bland greyness of the uk’s forever wet autumnal feel when the Atlantic parks a huge cloud over the country for 3 long months!
This is fine and dandy if you can get warm but your poorly insulated spanish house. We were for the first time miserable.....
We thought we were ready, Wendy having purchased Rointe electric radiators for each room. We turned the radiators on to a max and to be honest we only just felt a difference but then again we are cold morsels more akin to lizards than humans. We struggled along for 2 weeks partly in denial and partly out of loyalty to Wendy’s parents who very kindly paid for our radiators. Then ....... we received our electricity bill of €120 euros which was €60 higher than our previous highest which in turn was €20 euros higher than the usual ...... panic.
We logged on you our electricity supplier portal and could see that this increase coincided with the exact time that we turned the radiators on! The claims by Rointe for them to be economic were just lies and we had fallen for it even though they were expensive still no heat to be had.
I knew we had to do something so we ceased to use the radiators and could see that our usage plummeted back to previous rates but we were cold and miserable.
What to do? My Mum has a pellet burner which provides a blast of heat and warmth that you would pay €120 per month for. So I went off on a complete tangent and drive to Elche to buy a pellet burner,we had to wait for it to be fitted and then wait a Spanish week to get it certified all the while I was shitting myself as to whether it would work. Finally the man arrived and started the burner and signed it off Wendy hid in the bedroom fearing the worst....... he started it and nothing he laughed and said Diaz Minutos! And then it hit me a blast of heat that wendy could dance naked in front of wow!
I ran into the bedroom to give wendy the thumbs up the relief similar to passing a driving test. I nearly shook the fitters hand off and would have snogged him if he didn’t have a beard.
Heat security..... finally heat security! Thanks to my old Mum who paid for
This for us we are so lucky to be loved. Chapeau you
wendy and mum who fought with Leroy Merlin to get a refund on the radiators and well done to Leroy for being so professional.
Talk in the village: the talk in the village is a similar story to our personal story how cold it is and how expensive it is methods of keeping warm are exchanged tips and wrinkles are exchanged electricity bills compared. We know that this is short lived and very soon the thought of a heater will be long forgotten but for now it’s a very real problem. A close friend experiencing a bill of €169 after using air con and an electric heater ..... we saved his life by lending him a portable Calor gas heater.
We have had the Magor festival full of floats and sweets and toys (we went to Cartegena to watch)and spanish children have at last had their Xmas presents (06/01) after leaving shoes outside the door!
Cycling life: The cold is now a real problem for me as u have to leave so early to meet the Grupo it has been as low as 6c and warms to as much as 19c I have started to leave it much later to go out cycling to take advantage of the thaw.
Not much cycling for me as I was unlucky enough to contract the worst cold on record that turned into an infection I can’t help but think the travel innoculations have impacted on this.
Our first horror month.
Spanish Cycling Translations
Bib shorts – Pantelon con tirantes (m)
Bottom Bracket – Caja de Pedalier (f)
Brake Levers – Manetas (de Freno) (f)
Brakes – Frenos (m)
Carbon Fiber – Fibra de carbono (m)
To Ride – Montar o Ir en Bicicleta
Ride, Race, Action – Marcha (f)
Rim – Rim (m), Llanta (f)
Road Bike – Bici de Carretera (f)
Saddle – Sillín (m), Asiento (m)
Spanner – Llave Plana (m)
Stem – Poste de Manubrio (m)
Stem – Potencia (f)
Time trial bike – Bici de Contrareloj (f)
Tired – Cansado (m)
Tire – Cubierta (o “Neumáticos”) (f)
Titanium – Titanio (m)
Top Tube – Tubo Transeras (m), Tubo Superior, Tubo Horizontal
Touring Bike – Bici de Turismo (f)
Water Bottle – Bidóoacute;n (m)
Wheels – Ruedas (f)
Diciembre 2019 - The cold finally arrives
The weather has turned proper cold and we have also had so far about 7 days of rain bad enough to not go out on the bike!
Again we are reminded that Spain can be super cold when it wants to be. However at the time of writing this I am on the rear terrace in shorts and t shirt enjoying 28c whilst the tortoises are basking and having a good old wander.
The cold in our house is the number 1 topic as we are both cold morsels, we have bought Eco oiled filled radiators thanks to a gift from Wendys mum but to be honest they just don’t cut it as we still look for the warmth produced by central heating whilst we were in the UK.
Our thinking is to get a pellet burner fitted but it’s going to be €2000 which was
A) not in the budget
B) is also the cost of a new bike!
There are still many more good days than bad where you find a little spot and sizzle away nicely.
We have deliberately planned a quiet Xmas Wendy in particular enjoying being relaxed not having to pay for and eat so many Xmas meals, myself I am going to miss the works Xmas night out in particular chatting with my work wife Erick and seeing my Girls and Grandchildren however i must admit i am also enjoying the laid back approach. So it’s going to be a quick trip to La Zenia for the beach party an Xmas meal at Casa Ana with Mum and the old farts then down to Torre Beach for a massive ice cream.
Later in the evening we will retire to Casa Mummy watch Gavin and Stacy Xmas special and tuck in to the Rincon pudding (i hope i get the bean).
The sunsets are spectacular this time of year and Facebook is a very competitive place to display your photography.
Village talk: the talk is of how quiet Campoverde is, all the holidaymakers are gone and quite a few residents are in UK for Xmas. Another hot topic is where are you going for Xmas meal? Many establishments offering Menus at UK prices anything from £30 - to £100 this is way above the price we are willing to pay so we are taking a much more modest route.
Villagers are also talking about the fact that we have so many bars and restaurants closed down we have lost 4 big ones at the Church end and that’s on top of the 2 that never reopened after last year. It’s starting to look like a UK high street all estate agents but gladly no betting shops. It’s difficult to make a buck in Campoverde indeed, there is talk of weekly rentals of €1000!
Cycling:For me the cold has really arrived I have acclimatised to Spainish weather and anything under 14c is cold for me now and requires layers, on top of that I tend to start earlier than most as I have to ride 30k to
meet the Grupo and at 08:30 it’s been 7C so gloves, legs and long sleeves are the order of the day only to fry as the day grows older and the sun battles through.
Bed to Shed have become the hardest yards which is a shame as it’s no problem at all when the temps are in the 20C’s, however we know it will come back and it is usually bright blue skies.
Once I am out in the correct layers and on the Van Nich I have had some real nice long solo rides amongst the Sierras and the Citrus groves.
Even though full winter has only just arrived I have seen many sights that pass for spring lots of wildflowers, succulents and cactus flowering fast and of course the ever present citrus fruit. Whilst the only nod to anything resembling a UK Autumn are the Pomegranite trees which turn a beautiful gold before shedding the leaves and the last of the sweet fruit.
Recently whilst riding to Mirador my senses were assaulted with the unmistakable smell of brussel sprouts! Can’t get much more festive that that!
Feliz Navidad Y Prospero Año Nuevo
Update - Beach Party:Santa arranged for the great weather to return we have 24C over the Xmas period with no wind, it was amazing. Our Xmas day plan was always to do a recce to the Legendary
La Zenia Beach Party. So off we went not quite believing the weather we were enjoying THEN not quite believing what our eyes were seeing!
Estimated 5000 people on the beach all wearing Santa costumes, barbecues a sizzling wine and beer flowing great atmosphere. Leaving us to confirm thats where we will be spending Navidad 2020!
Xmas and the New Year, Navidad y Nuevo Anos
Until recently the Spanish didnt know about Father Xmas in fact the Spanish used to celebrate Xmas in a completely different way altogether. But as we all get
mixed up in the big European melting pot its all changing we see many a plastic Santa climbing many a chimney here in Pinar de Campoverde.
Here i try to describe the traditional Spanish Xmas as i know it (Many thanks to our Spanish teacher James). Should you know of anymore please let us know.
Greetings A greeting you may hear over the Xmas period is "Feliz Navidad y Prospero Ano Nuevo" beware your answer DO NOT SAY "Gracias" in response it will cause real offence the correct response is "Igualmente" which means equally, how
ever if you do let Gracias slip out you can redeem yourself with Igualmente .... i think im going to stay indoors over the whole of xmas and new year!
Nochebuena - Xmas Eve Nochebuena is an important day in Spain its the only day that the Spanish play the rare instrument the Zambomba this is a tight drum with a stick through it.
Its played by spitting on your hand gripping the stick and passing your hand up and down. This requires a copious amount of spit not just a polite cough. The instrument is now passed around to
each member of the dinner party until you have all played! EUGH just EUGH you dont want to be last.
You have to eat Gambas on Nochebuena and this forces the price to spiral, every year the shocking price makes the evening news!
Dia de Navidad - Xmas Day Although this is a Red day there is nothing of any significance to the Spanish.
El Dia de Los Inocentes - April fools day This is the day when practical jokes are made its a very tricky day as it will catch you out as its in the middle of the festive period
there have been many japes up to and including the scrapping of right hand drive cars!
Noche Vieja - New Years Day New Years day is an important day in Spain one of the traditions is the 12 grapes at midnight everybody has to try to eat a grape for
each toll of the bell!
There will be fireworks and and fizzy wine on offer much celebration in Spanish towns and villages but dont get caught out its going to start late and end late!
las horas de la suerte - The hours of lucklas horas de la suerte -The hours of luck It is also extremely bad luck not to wear red underwear on New Years Eve it will not be unusual to be asked.
Dia de Reyes - 6th January This is the day the Spanish give presents they leave shoes outside the door and the Los Reyes Magos - 3 kings will leave the presents in the shoes. Not Father Xmas - Papa Noel although the Spanish
kids have soon cottoned on to Papa Noel and hope to get 2 lots of presents. A traditional cake to be eated at 16:30 is the Roscon its like a filled sliced doughnut. Inside this doughnut will be presents buy always
a bean and a King, if you get the bean you have to pay for the Roscon if you get the King you get to be king for the day and everybody has to bend to your will.
Belen - Nativity ScenesBelen - Bethlehem (Nativity Scenes) are very popular in Spain all the villages and towns will have a Nativity scene varying in extravagance on how rich or large the town is!
But look out for the Cagon Man Every Belen will have a Cagon (Cagoner) and its very bad luck if you dont find him! The Cagoner is a man squatting to take a poo
Traditional cake and drink Polvorones cakes are snaffled up by the Spanish in their 1000's they are ground almonds held together with lard! They are notoriously dry and dusty.
Tarron cake is lovely and come in Duro (nougat) or Blando (fudge), the traditional drink is Sidra (cider) which has the label of a man with bagpipes on, its only 5% alcohol and is very sweet
you will be diabetic after 2 sips!
Noviembre 2019 - Having Lunch with the Dead
The beginning of November is beautiful with lovely days but chills in the evening which give you a hint as to what’s to come,
this year the cold came in hard and quick. It saw us reaching for the footprisons and arm prisons for the first time since early May.
It really got cold very quickly! The nights are drawing in but its still not dark until gone 18:00.
The crickets have been silenced by the drop in temperatures and i miss them.
The Bee Eaters have moved to warmer climbs i miss them congregating before they rest and the evening fly past. We now have starlings and many birds from the UK as for them it is warmer here now than in the UK and food is more plentiful.
Cycling: This saw a mix of days when we were riding with lightweight tops and shorts secretly patting ourselves on the back at having made such a great decision to move to Spain yet something in the weather meant we knew what was coming, let’s call it a shared secret not to be talked about like an alcoholic Uncle.
Oh but the infernal wind is back the seemingly never ending headwind which is so characteristic of living on a peninsular, no reward on the turnaround and strong gusts on the side.
When the cold came it came hard I found myself riding in 6c at 9am and was woefully under dressed really cold only to swing wildly to being over dressed the next day and roasting (even the Belgians are in longs now). However once we have got used to the new dress requirements the riding is good and the skies are blue with always the promise of some sun. We have to remind ourselves that its really much colder and wetter at home!
Campoverde Talk: The talk in the village is now of how much colder it is this year than last year. Attention is turned to Xmas and people are comparing notes on where they are eating on Xmas day and what the prices are, also whether it includes wine!
New Year parties are sold out and there is much disatisfaction about how the tickets were allocated.
November is also when the Spanish have lunch with the dead, they Spend the Saturday cleaning the gravestones to get them ready for the tomorrows lunch. This is a huge thing for the Spanish and not odd at all, huge swathes of land are set aside by the council for the parking.
Bourganvilla - The source of all evil?
A subject in the village that is very divisive. This plant is not the indigenous to Spain but is indigenous to Spanish Urbanisations.
As beautiful as it is prickly fast growing and climbing seemingly never ending blooms of great beauty.
But to let it get out of control and spill over to public property or worse still to your neighbours is courting disaster.
In Campoverde it has caused fights and fuelled denunciations. Residents have been forced to flee to the U.K. or other parts of the village.
Discarded blooms being lobbed back over garden walls (only to be blown back over by the next puff of wind).
Bills being presented for clogged and broken pool pumps. Letterboxes being stuffed with unwanted blooms! Fights in bars!
How something so beautiful can cause this chaos is beyond me.
Octubre 2019 - The gloating month
The first thing we noticed about October is the dew, almost at once every night everything is covered in a dew which in the U.K. would be frost.
A quick walk round the garden to look at the plants will reveal many small snails and insects that have come out to take advantage of the rare moisture. Indeed the big cactus is covered in snail trails and tiny white snails leaving me to wonder what they do the rest of the year round? Is this dew enough to sustain these desert dwelling plants and creatures? Do they yearn for the first day of October? As if in reply I can see serious attempts at growth on these plants as they continue the journey upwards!
October is the best month for gloating as the difference in the climate to Northern Europe is at its greatest. We experience regular temperatures of above 30c whilst the U.K. basks in 11c and is generally in its rainy season.
Village Talk: The talk in the village is of how awful it is in the UK and how lucky we are. However there is also the occasional nod to what is to come weather wise and villagers are getting the winter duvet cleaned and digging out trousers and socks.
Most of the holidaymakers have made their way home and these are replaced by the Scans, Snowbirds who flee the harsher climates of the artic circle positively roasting as soon as we hit 24c and who can blame them? You can spot them a kilometre off as they are still living outside when a chilly 24c has driven us southern softies indoors.
The days are shorter now, are we going to regret complaining of the heat are we going to pledge to spend more time outside next year? I think we will.
Cycling: The Cycling is really at its peak now we are enjoying the relief from the heat and our bodies are loving the unusually (for us)warm climates. Its like a second Spring as we see all sorts of
strange and colourful flora a fauna beging to appear. The fields are being prepped and planted for the next seasons crops which can mean quite strong smells on your journey.
Man bags - (Man hand bags) Why o why?
At what point does an Englishman abroad feel the time is right to buy a hand bag? Is it a moment of singular clarity? Does he see some man with one and think to himself that looks great? Has he always been secretly jealous of his Wife’s? And how does he choose which Manbag to have? Is it based on size,style, durability or does it have to match a particular holiday outfit?
Does any of this sound familiar? It should do because it should do as it’s a decision that most females have gone through at some point.
What happens to the manbag when an Englishman gets home? Does it get packed away like a dirty guilty secret? It must do as we don’t see many men in the U.K. walking around with them. So if it is so handy why is it packed away in such a sneaky fashion on return to the UK? Why is it so acceptable in Europe and not the U.K.? Is this a cowardly act?
Could it be that these men have an alter ego where they become much more camp or metro when they visit foreign climes?
There are many attempts by these guys to make them look more Macho or disguise them, wearing them across your chest, carrying them in your hand by the strap, fitting them to your belt at the side and of course the totally reprehensible fanny pack!
The manbag is not the Spanish way in fact I see very few Spanish men wearing them it seems to be other visiting European nations that monopolise this particular trait.
Perhaps my dislike of ManBag s says more about me than it does them?
Perhaps subconsciously I am jealous of them they do free up your pockets and allow you to carry more gadgets and I do like a gadget.
It does no harm but does not look good IMHO but I have to say this is a strange hill for me to choose to die on!
Septiembre 2019 - Belongs to the weather gods (and the flies)
Village Talk: The Village abounds with “those flies are doing my head in”.
The explanation for the outburst of flies is that all the non citrus fields have finished growing and the farmers have ploughed the fields, they will not spray them again until a month before planting.
The weather in September takes a turn for the better warm days some cloudy dreamy skies and even some rain, but in Spain there is rarely rain without lightening.
Cycling: Cycling in September is what dreams are made of but it does see the return of the interminable headwinds that seem to be permanent a small price to pay for perfection. Village Talk:The village is emptying out and the kids are back to school
It also belongs to the weather gods as the harshness has gone out of the heat and a little respite is found, it’s only 32c now so the Spanish have put the duvets back on and have got the jumpers out, all the shops are now selling winter wear.
Spanish Cyclists are wearing hats, buffs and arm warmers ..... I kid you not.
Gota Fria - A little bit of weather
These words are thrown around like confetti even heard the phrase of “false Gota Fria”. The weather forecast was for a Gota Fria over this week and very steadily the weather stations and the authorities have ramped up the angst to a fever pitch. “It never hits us here”, “ we have a microclimate” and other such horse shit is thrown around the village.
Well it did hit us and it was bad many people in the village had flowerpots knocked over and the swimming pools filled up for free I even saw a palm
Frond in the road, we were unable to buy coffee!
To be fair it was the most spectacular storm I have ever seen over 24 hours of thunder and lightning and torrential rain howling winds plus one tornado with the promise of more to come.
The battles going on in households played out to the sounds of shutters being closed and opened as we then boiled windows opening and closing TVs blasting as the power went off and on at regular intervals. but we heard surprisingly little from the local dog chorus so if you want to burgle do it during a Gota Fria!
To make light of it is unfair but we lucky up here at 200m above sea level it has been devastating for the local area and has been declared a national disaster.
The main problem being that this area (now officially a desert )is now woefully inadequate in dealing with water of any great magnitude ever since Franco dried up the natural rivers to irrigate the land as part of his dream that everyone would have a plot of land and be self sufficient, part of every lame dictators dream.
The cheap land grab for tourist housing and hotels has also contributed heavily to the problem. So now the roads have become the rivers and channel the water very effectively through towns and down to the low points where it collects along with bobbing Skodas, Seats and more than the occasional turd.
The sea is full of mud sewerage and the bloated corpses of animals you can see a clear delineation between the old sea and the new sea, swimming is banned as is fishing and any other activities.
Many a local mayor is still losing his job in light of Francos folly!
A Gota Fria can best be described as “air turbulence that lands”
The Spanish are not phased by this and deal with this as easily as they order Vino Tinto, Spanish life just goes on.
Agosto 2019- Belongs to the Cockroach
Village Talk: August.....belongs to the Cockroach, they are reaping the results of many months good work, it’s not that there many more of them it’s just that they have reached their peak completed the breeding cycle and are slowly dying (the oap’s), they have got slow and we see them more and are much more vulnerable to predators, sliders and flip flops.
Conversation is abuzz in the village about various situations where they have been encountered Cockroaches Man, Women and children are universally terrified English and Spanish alike. Seeing one fly (the females) .....has been known to trigger a heart attack!
Cures are talked about almost incessantly whether it be moth balls, Lavender or something that actual works like sprays called “Prevail” or out personal favourite of “Oro” our houses are as noxious as Chernobyl but at least we are Cockroach free. It’s not unusual to visit a house and find all the plugs in situ and the overflows in sinks blocked up with wine corks, we have followed suit but I am still unsure whether it’s true or Campoverde folklore.
Once a year the council visit the village and lift up the drains to spray poison in doing this the cockroaches make their escape and scuttle for freedom then die ..... Wendy cut such a funny figure chasing them down the drain with the broom whilst simultaneously being terrified and shaking ..... she is a trooper my wife.
August also belongs to the Madridians who like the Parisians are reviled by the local
Spanish. In Madrid everyone has to take 2 weeks off in August which makes madrid empty. They have to take the first 2 weeks or the last 2 weeks which leaves the roads saturated for the first 2 week period (they will close one of the motorway roads in and make another out lane) they do this on the last day of t he 4 weeks as well to create an extra inbound lane! But what do you do in the middle weekend when there is equally as many going in as out? Gridlock is what you get it’s madness and very sad that every year there are many fatalities as a result as the drivers refuse to drive safely. The madiridians fill the local beaches of lo pagan and la Manga and the Mar menor prices rise much to t he dismay of the Campoverdians.
Cycling: is almost impossible, but not quite. Club rides start much earlier and are shorter the rides are supplemented with Coke and litres of water. The scenery is stunning the roads are packed with cyclists enjoying the weather!
It is now not unusual for me to see temperatures exceeding 38c on the local climbs where there is little wind. A headwind is viewed as a benefit hot wind is better than no wind at all. Everything is extreme, whatever you wear is wrong.
Julio 2019 - Belongs to the Sun
Belongs to the Sun it dominates your ever every waking and sleeping thought!
Village Talk: The chat in the village turns to stuff of folklore “it never used to be this hot”. Many old wives tales abound for keeping cool in desperate attempts to at least sleep.
Keep all the shutters down and close the windows, don’t open the doors for too long, wear wet sweat bands to bed around your wrists and so on......basically a prison.
Conversations also turn to how much it costs to run an air conditioner / ceiling fans and whether they should be fitted? Of course they should be fitted, these are the same people who would not have blinked an eye before switching on the central heating on! Many of the people people in the village are now hostage to the weak pound and have very real concerns, some of these people are new and cannot see that they will ever have this concern which of course they will as the Euro marches on relentless as our hapless politicians look on in indifference as they are wealthy and able to move their significant funds to more lucrative areas to shelter from the crisis in the £. There are of course financial concerns for everyone which apparently don’t apply to their swimming pools!
The actual solution is to live more like the Spanish eat later in the evening (sorry you will missCorry and Eastenders). Put your air conditioners on at a temperature about 3 degrees lower than the outside temperature, close your blinds change your routines.
The Spanish have outdoor kitchens which will be used throughout July and August exclusively it’s madness to cook in the house after all.
The Crickets are now deafening and there is no break at night!
The actual solution is to live more like the Spanish eat later in the evening (sorry you will miss Corry and Eastenders). Put your air conditioners on at a temperature about 3 degrees lower than the outside temperature, close your blinds change your routines.
Cycling: The weather is hot but cycling is still very much doable, we need to hydrate much more and reduce the distance. What a pleasure it is to get ready to ride so simple shorts shoes and a lightweight jersey pure freedom, the temperature being 20c at 08:00am. Riding is superb with the colours of the mountains and the contrasts making them so beautiful.
Junio 2019 - A Gemini of a month
Is a Gemini of a month, on the one hand some days are fabulous a 28c in the shade with a nice breeze, pleasant warm evenings and the sea starting to get warm. However there is also just a preview of what’s to come with the occasional 38c with no wind at all..... a scary prelude of what’s to come.
Village Talk: Talk in the village is of holiday makers.
The village begins to fill up with Holiday makers who for my part at least add a little welcome variety to everyday
life. It’s quite odd to see people walking our village streets carrying Unicorn Floaties, Giant inflatable melons , Spongebob and crop tops and bathers! Pink Skins and tan lines Geordie and Scouse accents can be heard, the Rusty Nail is packed with strangers taking advantage of cheap beer and cigarettes watching the football on wide screens from outside.
The ladies looking like they have been forced into their clothes under pressure making them look even more like lobsters as they knock back sangria and convince each other with a shriek that it’s healthy because of the fruit.
The Restaurants soon adapt and many of them up the prices of a menu Del Dia or Del Noche, to be fair they have to make hay while the sunshine’s in order to stay in business but it’s a big peev with the locals who scoff and mutter under their breath.
Cycling: Cycling in June is amazing the views are almost 3d and nice days are almost guaranteed you finally say goodbye to arm warmers and medium layers. The days are longer and the temperature numbers are higher, there is a seemingly endless amount of riders cycling around the Orihuela Costa. The end of June is starting to get extreme i rode to Andalucia and experienced temperatures of 44c. The milage of 100 miles a day is now getting to be difficult as the roads take their toll.
The Spanish - Warm friendly, noisy and crazy
How do I begin to describe the Spanish? It’s not complicated at all, “Sensitive” yet “Not sensitive at all”. On the one hand please do not ignore the Spanish in any circumstances this can be the greatest insult. If you are in a Supermarket always say Hola! For sure you will get a Buenas Diaz in return or if you choose Buenas Diaz you will get an Hola in reply as the Spanish are taught never to repeat the greeting as it’s rude and ignorant.
The Hierarchy of the Spanish isn’t complicated it’s all about the Family , the Madre is in charge, the Ninos come a very close second children are to be marvelled at cooed over and regaled with your compliments at every possibility. They are a thing to behold!
Mothers are to be loved obeyed and respected, they in turn bestow comfort and love to all the children and grandchildren.
The boys do not leave home until an average age of 32 is reached. Next in the order is friends who will be loved and treasured followed by food and religion and talking.
Religion (the Church in fact as an organisation) has tumbled down the order over the last 40 years after the death of Franco and his partnership with the Church, the new King separating the Church from the state and lawmaking being one of the bravest and greatest peacetime feats of any Royal.
Food is so important in Spain it has its own chapter.
Talking,
: The Spanish are warm and friendly they take talking to a whole new level to witness this is a privilege indeed. Seemingly able to talk to several people simultaneously whilst being spoken to at the same time. Agreeing and disagreeing at the same-time with wild hand gesture that could land an incoming plane, all this whilst keeping an amiable manner and a friendly smile and of course using the phone, driving a car and smoking a cigarette!
Abril 2019 - belongs to the Festival
In Spain belongs to the Festival, the biggest festival of all is the Santa Semana which was initially confusing for me and many kids I am sure, a week of Santa what a thing.
! Of course Santa Semana means Saints week a week of Festivals (Easter) that only the Spanish will ever fully understand. These festivals are loved and are spectacular to watch and participate in.
whilst practising Catholicism has plummeted in Spain since the death of Franco the festivals and the traditions are much loved and the Spanish are proud of them.
In the UK we have Saints and Crucifixes in our Churches and they are pretty static for hundreds of years gathering dust and pigeon shit hi up in the eves. In Spain they like to take them walkies at regular intervals. Carried along on the shoulders of the chosen parishioners painfully on huge platforms in a uniform march along preset routes, inevitably followed by a band or two. Even into the ocean I add.
Very impressive it is too gathering huge crowds. Each route depicts a particular chapter in the life of a particular Saint long forgotten from my Sunday School days.
It’s not just April that this happens there is the fantastic Moors and Christians weeks and the Day of the Dead all fascinating.
April weather can be a pretty mixed bag but there is promise of better to come still nippy in the evenings. I am still in Foot Prisons and wearing long sleeves. April is when you first hear the Crickets calling which usually starts at around 24C, its a sound that i have always loved as it means warmth.
The Bee Eaters have returned and charm us with a nightly display of flying and the beautiful chirping, this is the sign of summer.
Village Talk: The talk in the village is of when will summer arrive? Its so much colder than last year, the chatter is also of "Red Days" and festivals.
Cycling: Cycling in April when the weather is fine it’s a joy, the heady smell of the orange and lemon blossom can be overwhelming but be aware that this will all to soon be replaced with the stench of shite as the non citrus crops are fertilised.
The fields and meadows are full of wild flowers a real feast for the eyes and huge alien / Triffid like blooms of which kind I do not know fill the desert air as succulents and cacti take advantage of the milder climate.
But don’t get caught out in the rain on your bike in Spain as it can be the coldest experience known to a cyclist, yes crazy I know but you have to experience it to believe it.
The Spanish Cyclists are still in full winter gear with hats, longs, Overshoes, balaclavas and gilets.
The English holiday makers on training camps have of course have been caught out and are all pink noses, pink skin and chattering teeth as they are determined to make the best of it.
Facebook - Use with caution
I have heard Facebook be referred to as “like a village”, on the whole I am not a fan but I do dabble. Part of the reason that I am not so much a fan is A book I read called the ‘undoing project’ which is a book that in a nutshell unravels how people make choices and take certain stances.
It seems that even the most intelligent and influential amongst us make our choices based on a bad mix of facts and what we like to believe (it fits in with a pre existing belief) and that then becomes our stance over any facts or figures. Now if this is the case for the highest and brightest amongst us what does that mean for the shit munchers like us?
You see it time and again on Facebook where people advice others or berate others for their opinions or statements spouting their opinions to be fact whereas in reality it’s just what they have come to believe and they actually don’t know (or care) why they believe it.
The Expat Facebook groups in our area are particularly bad for this and I have witnessed some very bad bullying behaviours by keyboard warriors crouching over the keyboard just waiting for a slip up! In one particular incidence I saw that a man call a woman stupid for asking a question, on looking at his other posts I was amazed to see that he had only ever used Facebook to make comments like this and had never made a constructive post. I wish him well and hope that he wakes up and smells the coffee it must be a sad life to live it in a world of unkindness and I am hopeful that he would not speak to another human being face to face like that.
If Facebook is like a village it’s like a village where all the village idiots have been given a megaphone and a solid position on every topic imagine that.
So for fluffy kittens, crazy dogs and videos of giant turds choose Facebook but for humility, friendship and professional advice go to the actual village and speak to somebody nice!
Marzo 2019 - Strawberries!
Belongs to the strawberry it’s high season for locally grown strawberries and what a treat this is.
I can only imagine in older times if the joy that the taste of strawberries would have of been after a winter of bland stews and rehydrates meats it must have of given hope for the summer to come and the end of the cold.
These strawberries can be purchased in wicker baskets of a kilo for a euro or two "heaven".
Cycling:Always the wind, the infernal wind that seems to have no end, never a tailwind and always a strong sidewind!
Cycling can be difficult but usually blue sky’s, sky’s that can lure you into the wrong clothing choices as it’s surprisingly cold especially along the coastal roads.
As you pass the more remote villages you will see many Spaniards sitting outside the houses in the sun under blankets as it’s warmer out then in the houses.
If you see them
always say Buenas Diaz and wave as they are very friendly and love to be acknowledged they will invariably say a greeting back (they don’t care that you are English). This is their country and we are guests passing through it is these proud agricultural people that were the backbone of Spain and managed to survive the Franco regime and gift us with the warm friendly nation that we love.
The houses are generally colder inside than out, this is when the folk of Campoverde will tell you that they are designed to lose heat in the summer, however this is not the case as in the summer they are like hot boxes .... they are just poorly built.
Village Talk: The talk in the village is of how unusual wet the march has been which means a really good April.... lets see